Tjugotre

If you dream of horses you will walk in the forest with your friend the next day and find a dead toad in a pond, you will climb the fence that is around the pond and after trying for a while finally pick the toad out of the water. Then you will poke it a little and be grossed out and then you’ll bury it and put some stones on the grave.

Tjugotvå

If you dream of watching a hare as it gets brutally mutilated by a predator and is brought into an extremely painful and insanely slow death, staying alive much longer than it should and being obviously tormented, you will be thrown into a horrible void-like lonelyness since you forgot Tudden at home. Yes, that is my pillow. Yes, I’ve been without it for a few hours and I already miss it. Don’t expect any dreams from me for a week.

Tjugoett

If you dream of having friendly fights and wrestling with your friends, you’ll have to endure the pains and bruises from the friendly fights that actually took place the previous day.

Tjugo

If you dream that you are having dinner with Silvio Berlusconi (and you get the feeling you’re having dinner with someone like Dracula who will drink your blood before you can go home) and all the glass and china is black, and you sit opposite to him and he keeps watching you and force you to drink a lot of bad tasting liquor and eat raw pig intestine, the bug in the bottle in your window will suddenly get cancer and die immediately. (It was not my fault, must have been the cancer.)

Nitton

If you dream of peeing, further dreaming of waking up and discovering that you wet your friends mattress, you will have a horrid encounter with the first moth of the year, and you will get soap in your eyes as you try to constantly keep an eye at the vile creature while taking a shower.

Arton

If you dream that you are drowning in the banana muffins you have to make to keep the Easter bunny from eating you, you will meet a jackass, a nice lady and your back won’t hurt as much as the day before. (explanation: the nice lady will help you to make copies of the book that makes your back hurt, so now you don’t have to carry it around… thanks to the jackass who refuses to help you, that’s when you go to find the nice lady, you will almost not catch the train home)

Sjutton

If you dream of your mom calling you to a life-or-death mission to shoot of the military ghosts that appears by the graveyard next door once a year (on a military-related date), then about killing a lot of zombies (some more or less sane) in a handfull of different ways (some involving acid) in a sort of competition, somewhere in between being a little blue bird building a nest for his new wife and two kids (from an earlier relationship), Matilda gets sick. 😦

Sexton

If you dream of some of your best friends having a horrible time in their new lives (having finished your previous common school), expecially one who gets bullied and beaten in her new school, which you prevent by spending all your free time at her school, so that all the bullies stay away from her in pure respect of you since you’re just that awesome, you’ll find that you’re getting far too little enthusiasm from your friends when you tell them of your great impulsive investment in a Xbox 360.

Femton

Om du drömmer att du måste kräla i minimala, plana grottor fyllda med grus upp till några decimeter under taket när du ska byta flygplan (du måste ju hem från spelträffen också), vilket ger dig yrsel och cellskräck, så kommer den potentiellt i alla fall lite roliga tentan att vara skittråkig.

Fjorton

If you dream of getting involved in a carcrasch, thinking you got away nicely with just an injuried knee, later getting proven wrong by your friends and family who are devastated because the accident got to your brain and changed your personality without you noticing, you’ll find that Ica is out of the most things that you need to buy.